So as everyone knows, there is a HOSTESS SITUATION. Some morons have been freaking out with the thought that there will be NO MORE TWINKIES! So much so, that boxes of Twinkies are selling for over $800 on ebay. I KID YOU NOT (link) Yeah. Completely RETARDED. Even funnier are the stories coming out today that the beloved brands will probably survive being baked by other companies or sold outright to other companies. AND that Hostess has put off liquidation and agreed to mediation.

Funny thing is though, that the very second I heard Hostess was closing the “opportunist” in me told my wife we needed to run to Wal-Mart and buy ALL the Twinkies we could to sell them to idiots on ebay. She didn’t say no, but I’m sure thought I was ridiculous.

She has been sad about the Orange Zinger situation though, after realizing that Dolly Madison = She hasn’t had one in like 12 years or something. I guess people are just stupid and cling to these brands and sweet memories.

Sweet memories that poison us and make us fat and lazy for when the Chinese come for us….we’ll be too slow to get away.