Year of the Bitchon December 27, 2012 at 8:37 pm
Ever wondered why your formerly semi-normal wife, girlfriend, or fuck buddy has suddenly turned into a rage filled volatile bitch? Well, besides the fact that you are probably an asshole her birth control may be to blame. Progesterone based birth controls such as the Mirena IUD, Depoprovera, and the Nuva Ring may literally be driving her crazy.
*DISCLAIMER-If talk of lady issues bothers you MOVE ALONG. There is nothing to see here.*
About a year ago after a pregnancy scare and an encounter with Mifeprex, I decided to be more responsible about my reproductive health and get a Mirena IUD.
For those that don’t know it’s a piece of plastic laced with birth control hormone strategically placed in a ladies Hooha to prevent pregnancy.
Sounds like a blessing, right? No more patches, pills, or bottle toss rings to worry about, right? Nothing is ever that easy. For the last year I have no trouble admitting that I have been a stark raving bitch most of the time. The simplest thing can set me off. A choice word overheard MUST have been about me. Plans broken or phone calls not placed WERE secret plots against me. I’m like a few steps away from full blown schizo up in here. Maybe it has been my punishment for being a baby killer. Maybe I should have known better being that I had a similar reaction to the Depo-Provera shot in 1999.
What I do know is that the government should use my experience to in some way create rage filled super warriors. With the proper catalyst I could have taken out a decent sized village. Today I ripped that bitch from my loins. I refuse to be a puppet to a tiny piece of plastic coated with insanity.
Exercise extreme caution if you plan to accuse your she-hulk of being taken over by birth control rage. In my glory I may have punched Mr. Evil in the nuts for such an assertion. I suggest you email her this link to this blog and let me do the dirty work http://yirmumah.keenspot.com/?p=1943. Then maybe hide out for a day or so.